Tuesday, July 6, 2010

muddled.

i had a few days of cloudiness in my mind, so that if you had sat down to coffee with me and asked how i was feeling or what was going on inside of me, i wouldn't have known what to say. i felt a little distant from God and just muddled emotionally. not even bad, just--hollow. distracted.

conveniently, as the sun finally shines down on seattle, so has the confusion started to dissipate in my mind. i feel some clarity forming. i journaled for the first time in weeks last night. i'm starting to sort through all these thoughts and emotions that have been bumping around together in my head.

i think what began that process was having a very specific prayer request for one of my dear friends answered last night. i told God sometimes i feel silly talking out loud in my car and asking things for people. i told Him it might be nice if i got some sort of sign that He heard me as i zipped along on i-90 to work every morning, because sometimes i felt like i was repeating a wish list out loud to myself and not really believing any of it would come about. so the very specific fulfillment of a request i have been presenting to God for the last three-odd weeks was like the first ray of sunshine breaking through my cloudy confusion. it certainly renewed my vigor for prayer this morning.

here's to the sunshine.

1 comment:

  1. you might want to try imaginative prayer. although thats a little hard to do while driving. its possible though.

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