Thursday, December 16, 2010

speak now.

so much sorting through of my heart this week!

i might fill up this journal before christmas day.

i would highly recommend taking a sabbatical away from the world the way i have been doing the past week or so.  not disappearing from society forever, just dipping below the radar for a bit.  long enough to regain perspective, to dig through the many layers, deep down to the true issues of the heart.  long enough to hear from God.  i have been trying to keep things quiet enough to hear what He might have to say, rather than merely granting Him a timeframe of roughly 15-30 minutes every morning, usually over breakfast, to speak up. "speak now, God, or forever hold your peace!"  so goes the daily routine.

not this week.  and i know i joke that i have a lot of feelings...but i have a lot of feelings.  and thoughts and struggles.  because i am human, i get distracted, i am broken.  perhaps someone out there can identify with those statements.  and i can't say that i have had a miraculous breakthrough (yet), but nonetheless it feels good to be sorting through it all.  to acknowledge it and be able to give a name to the things going on inside of me.  i have been letting a lot of other people tell me who i am and how i feel.  i needed to take a look for myself.  and it feels right to do.

i'm sorry this is vague.  actually, i'm not.  you can only do so much soul-baring on the internet.  but there's that.

here's to college students soul-searching over christmas break, eh?  surely i'm not the only one?


  1. cheers to college students soul-searching over christmas break, and to monitored soul-baring via internet.